My friends and I are the same, we'd much rather hang out with a smaller group of people playing ruit and things than crowding into a bar and blowing cash on expensive drinks.

For my birthday, my friends had a kind of beer olympics. Flip cup, ruit, quarters, etc. It was a blast and I was with all of the people I really wanted to be with on my birthday. I went out to bars eventually, but on my actual birthday I did what I love doing and that was most important. Google Beer Olympics and you'll get some great ideas for events. Shape the games to fit your buddy and your friends. We also usually make some kind of special shot as a punishment or reward (which ever way you want to view it haha). That will make it seem like more of a birthday thing as well. Make it something you guys would never normally do like surfers on acid or something that fits your tastes. Even with the special alc, you'll prob spend a lot less money than if you had gone to some bar.

Do make sure he goes to the liquor store! It's a right of passage, but make sure you give him money so he's not paying for his birthday shots.

I'm turning 21 next week, and have pretty much the same thing. I'm doing a three-part-party. Dinner and cake for people who don't want to drink, bar for those who want to drink and are 21+, and a speakeasy thing at my place for people who aren't.

For my 21st, there were kind of two parties, one with both sets of friends. Going out to bars is a must on your 21st and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise.

The way we did it was to hang out and have a few beers with my underage friends (oh no!). We just hung out while my friends gave me the most ridiculous presents the world has ever seen. (One of my gifts was 30 free hours to AOL 4.0.)

Once the clock struck 12, we headed out to a few bars.

I'm turning 21 in... uh... 13 days (but i seem to have forgotten today's date, so it's up in the air). And my friends and I are headed to a restaurant. That way, I can have my obligatory alcoholic beverage and my under-21 friends (which seems to be everyone) can.. watch or something.

Fun fact, my landlady left a fully stocked bar in the condo I'm renting. Might as well teach her to not leave several bottles of wine when renting to college students.